missing facebook...

so i deactivated my facebook account last week on impulse... and now its killing me. that's how you know your addicted to something. when you literally are begging it back. ( much like most of my addictions) i was having one of those days. well i have been having a weird month or 2 actually. i dyed my hair from blonde again back to dark- again on impulse... so impulsive, that if my hair girl didn't get me in... i was going to box color it.. and we all know how traumatic that can be for ones strands.... the nerve of me! and then i  turned to facebook... when in doubt.. and no control over your current scenario... face book is always a good start,..... and it makes you look ....'oh-so-mature".... so ... in the most maturest of fashions, i  started by deleting those whom i felt may be a) toxic to my life or b) pointless in my life. well when that didn't solve my feelings of whatever it was i feeling.. i took a leap of faith on my own personal little voice box inside my head...and  it says to me daily :
" your amazing. (well this is how it starts)... you sit on facebook to much. you are sort of obsessed with sharing your thoughts, and guess what... no one gives a fuck! no one cares your miserable today. so cut it... and BY THE WAY self!!!!!!- looking at things you likely shouldn't see on facebook anyway is damaging to your heart and your arguably crazy head. you my friend are your worst enemy.. and ps... on a side note... your a little wild on this personal facebook. take it off for awhile . your job will thank you".

now i never planned to keep it off forever. merely a few weeks. take some time to focus on work... and maybe even "me" a little. bettering myself. plus it couldnt hurt to try something new and really... its only facebook! but i have to be honest.....IM BORED. and ... every picture i have ever uploaded and tagged a friend in - is gone! we all found that out the hardway - when my  roommate realized we no longer have any pics!!!! I'm the one who loads all the albums and basically EVERY thing we have done the last year is gone!

i know what your thinking- who cares... and rightfully so... but .... i have found that SEVERAL texts have come in asking me to be back on facebook.. and despite my thinking that "no one cares" some people find my miserable humor, comical, and enlightening day to day and they are now a little bored without my "shenanigans. (so i am told) which brings me to my blog. i no longer care that someone i know may read this and find out what im really thinking. i no longer will filter what i feel - bc people don't want to hear it. again as i said in the last one.. as it is 'my facebook" its my blog . i say what i want. no judging. just reading.
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i find this - writing in general to be an outlet for me. i hate talking on the phone. ask my friends - i hate it. i would text or email all day... this is why i like facebook.. i can express thru humor or rage in a status exactly how my entire day is- in 2 sentences.. and people i haven't talked to in 2 years have just been updated on my life. its genius if you ask me. im beginning to see that what i miss about facebook- and i have only been deactivated for  1 WEEK... (lol).... IS THE EXPRESSION. the chance to write.. to make people laugh daily. whether i am sad, heartbroken, happy, or utterly angry to the point of no return, i find when i write it, i feel better about it, and my friends can relate... (sometimes.. i mean, not everyone can relate.. my antics are top notch)... so blog away i say... as long as i can think of something to bitch about or blab about I'm on my way... enjoy!